This is YOUR life

So, you ever get to the point in your life where you just want to press pause? You know, that moment when all of a sudden you start thinking to yourself, Wait! How did that happen?  I can't believe I said THAT! What do I do now? If you are anything like me then this tends to happen oh I don't know... every few weeks! Sometimes though it is other things besides contemplation that puts me in this mood. Tonight it happened when my sister Mel made me watch a presentation of hers for school and listen to the song that she had picked out to go along with it. The Title of the song is This is Your Life by Switchfoot. And it got my thinking. I'm going to show you the lyrics so you can see what i mean...

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you’ve broken
Don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes
This is your life and today is all you’ve got now
Yeah, and today is all you’ll ever have
Don’t close your eyes
Don’t close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over

This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Don’t close your eyes
Don’t close your eyes
Don’t close your eyes

Don’t close your eyes

This is your life are you who you want to be
This is your life are you who you want to be

This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

And you had everything to lose 

Do you see what I mean? I mean WOW! Isn't that like a punch in the gut? Am I who i want to be? No. Is this the life I dreamed of? NO! I want to have a job that challenges me, a car that is mine and actually works, and a man that thinks I'm his soul mate. The aftermath of this song can be a bit bitter but its also a kick in the pants to push us to accomplish our dreams. I'm working on the job and the car ( Wish me luck!) now all i need is a man.... LOL ( wish me A LOT of luck! )

Ciao!

Real Friends vs. Not Real Friends

Ok so lately life has shown me a few simple ways of telling a real friend from a not real friend or a fake as we shall call it for the duration of this blog.

Real Friend: Tells it to you straight no matter what (i.e. I don't like that person you are dating, i think he/she is a bad idea)

Fake Friend: Lies through their teeth (i.e. No that neon orange mini skirt that is two sizes too small DOES NOT make your butt look big)

Real Friend: Has your back no matter what (i.e. How dare they tell you that you look like a troll! Let's go kick some butt, let me just get my crutches.)

Fake Friend: Only has your back when its easy (i.e. They said your hair looks bad today? Lets give them dirty looks even though they are no longer in the room)

Real Friend: Confronts you when you are doing something stupid (i.e. Hey! You are a moron! Black and Brown DO NOT go together!)

Fake Friend: Doesn't care enough to tell you (i.e. Yeah, i knew your pants were unzipped all day... I thought you knew)

Real Friend: Listens to you when you have a problem then helps you come up with a solution (i.e. Here's a tissue, ok what if you do this? would that help?)

Fake Friend: Listens to you when you have a problem then explains why their problem is worse (i.e. I know you have cancer and are going to die but yesterday this girl made fun of my shoes!)

In summary, A real friend is ALWAYS there for you and they NEVER turn their back. Some people like the phrase " A good friend bails you out of jail, a best friend is sitting next to you saying, that was fun!" Me,I prefer the phrase that says " A best friend is someone who opens the door and sees you holding a dead body, doesn't  say anything, just grabs a shovel and helps you bury it"

I want to thank all my REAL friends, John, Becca, Mel, Sara,and Tommy. Thanks Guys! You ROCK!

The Death of a Dream and the Beginning of a Nightmare

Hey, sorry yall. I forgot my password and then life went down the drain. My Christmas was pretty good. I got to do the devotions and i had this (in my humble opinion) awesome lesson. And i even wrote a poem, which i will post as soon as i found it lol. A little after Christmas i found my dream car. A 2003 Chrysler PT Cruiser, in a very pretty blue color. I did all my research on and I drove it off the lot two days after the new year. This car was perfect. Everything worked, it had spunk, and it completely suited my personality. I named it Miss Bonnie Lou after my grandmother who had always wanted a PT Cruiser. So on January 14 I was on my way to pick up my friend Kay-Kay, to take her to this thing for a job she wanted. I was running behind, which means I was speeding, and i got pulled. I was not happy but whatever. Then I get off the highway at the exit that leads to my friend's place. I'm driving and wondering how I'm going to tell my parents when I notice this car looks like its going to drive right out in front of me. I hit the breaks but it didn't do anything. I ended up hitting her car going 30 miles an hour. Her car was pushed forward and out of the street. My car stayed in the lane I had started in. My airbags deployed and people it does not feel pleasant. There was smoke everywhere and my neck to my waist was numb from the airbag. The girl who i hit, she turns out to be not only someone i know but a friend of my sisters, had to help open my door because it got bent in the accident. And i get out. I'm shaking and yes i will admit crying as well. And then i look over and see that the girl whose car i hit ( Let's call her Marybeth for the heck of it) had two girls in the car with her. Thankfully no one was seriously injured. One girl got cut by her ear but that was it. I called my friend and her, her husband and her uncle rushed over to be with me. Thank God for that because i was a wreck (pun intended). The cop was a BUTTHEAD, who went as far as to CHASTISE ME because when i called the cops (which i didn't a witness called it in) i didn't mention that my car was still in the road. He said that if they had know that they would have come quicker. I KNOW! I was pissed about it too (after the shock wore off) Ant, Kay-Kay's husband took pics of my car for me and i called my parents and my dad came to pick me up.A tow car put Miss Bonnie Lou on its car holding thingy and I started crying all over again. Then Kay-Kay's uncle helped me cross the street ( i didn't need it but it was still sweet) and I met up with my dad. I went to the ER and got checked out. The doctor there was also a butthead ( can i pick them or what?). Then i went home. I ended up having to get my back adjusted since the accident threw it out of whack. Btw it takes weeks for your back to go back to the way it is supposed to be. I had to put up with stupid insurance people, I do not suggest getting State Farm. Anyways five days later I FINALLY get a rental car. A nice 2011 Chevy Malibu with the attitude of a cheerleader. Arielle and i went to highway K to get dinner and it started to snow so we quickly finished and headed home. Guess what? This idiot ( and that is as nice as i can put it) decided it would be completely ok to cross three lanes on the highway going 50 mph IN A SNOW STORM!! Do you see where this is going? He spun (DUH!) and Yup you guessed it, he hit the front of my rental car. Let me just say i was FREAKING OUT!!! Thank God for Arielle, she was calm and managed to get me to calm down. Fast forward to now, a whole month later. The insurance people finally got their butts in gear and said the rental car accident wasn't my fault. But the people handling my first accident are ...guess what? BUTTHEADS! I'm having to borrow my sister's car to go to and from work ( something neither one of us like) and I have learned that I highly dislike insurance people. My goal is to be able to get another PT Cruiser. Pray for me ok? I can use all the help i can get!

Words of Wisdom from the Not So Wise

I started hanging out with my cousin recently. She is younger then myself and i was thinking of all the things i could teach her that I have learned while growing up. I figured I could pass it on to my readers as well. Now I must warn you, not all of my lessons that i learned are necessarily good. But they will either make you think or laugh.

Lesson 1: Always be you... whoever that is- I have come to realize that when you are completely you in everything you do, people start reacting in kind. And it is SO much better dealing with a real person than a fake one lol

Lesson 2 : If you have a need for speed... Don't drive at the end of the month - Cops have a quota for speeding tickets ( stupid i know, but if you think about it, that is how they raise money for their county) and at the end of the month all the cops who haven't met said quota will be out looking for prey. Watch OUT!

Lesson 3: Everything is an Adventure.. even if it isn't fun - If you look at everything as an adventure, every new experience, every day, then you find that you enjoy it more.

Lesson 4 : Always Observe... then jump in, if necessary - Watch everything that goes on around you. One it is normally pretty interesting and Two you start picking up useful info. For example by watching people you start to notice things such as when they are lying or how to read body language.

Lesson 5: Be happy!... Even if that means sometimes not being happy- Life is short, we have heard that a million times, but sometimes i don't think it clicks for us. Try to find something enjoyable in all aspects of life and when it comes down to choosing a job, try finding one that suits you and doesn't make you feel like a monkey.

Lesson 6: Watch the movie!... Don't give it away! - This lesson is thanks to my cousin Tanner and my friend Becca. When watching a movie. If you haven't seen it before, flippin' watch the movie so you don't have to keep nudging your friend ( me) and ask What happened? If you have seen it before, keep your little mouth shut so the other viewer (me) can be surprised when bad guy #3 gets killed by the good guy.

 All I can think of for now. I will more than likely think of a billion more as soon as i post this but oh well. That will be a post later on then. Hope this helped in some small way :)
CIAO!

A night on THE HILL!

So my mother's birthday was Weds. but we didn't get to celebrate it till tonight. So we ended up going to Zias which is this AMAZING italian resturant down on the hill. If you don't know, The Hill,  is this small community in down town STL filled with Italians. Italian resturants, Italian bakeries, and tons of italian families. I LOVE it there! I would love to live there if it wouldn't require leaving all my friends, my church and one of my jobs behind. So we go to Zias and we had to wait for 45 minutes to get a table but its cool because my mom, my sister , and I were cracking up laughing the whole time. I think it had to do with lack of sleep on my sister's and my part and also the fact that going to Zias is a huge adventure for my family.  We got our seats and our waiter who seemed snooty came over and the got the ball rolling. My favorite workers there were 2 of the busboys because they werent all uppity like our waiter. My dad and my sister ate their weight in bread and i actually didn't do much eating, mostly because i was cracking jokes or trying not to laugh with soda in my mouth ( it ends up showering people and for some INSANE reason, they don't like that so...)  The meal was really good. I suggest the Cavatelli! It is my all time favorite food! The ride home was a little bit more subdued but only because my mom wasn't feeling good and my dad was being a party pooper. Oh plus my dad is a slow driver so it seemed to take FOREVER to get home ( which is what my Facebook status refers to in case you were wondering) which of course became something else my sister and i were giggling about. All in all a pretty successful evening. I will leave out telling you about how i had to wake up at 4:30 AM and Max threw up when we got home. Because they seem to be mood killers lol. I hope to leave you in a mood for a family outing that involves pasta. How did i do? :)
CIAO!

A TV Episode Life

I know, I know! Its been FOREVER since i have posted. I apologize.  Life seems to have a way of going so fast that its hard to even take a deep breath every once in awhile. So i have to tell you some things. I have a new job! Yeah! I'm not really excited though, in fact i have been feeling worried and slightly, or more than slightly if im being completely honest, panicy about it. It is something I have never done before and I don't know what to expect which makes me, a die hard worry wart, nervous. There has been issues along the way too, for example, I found out today ( I start tomorrow) what time I am actually starting, what i am supposed to wear, and that i will be required to work Saturdays and some Sundays. For those of you who don't really know me, finding stuff like this out at the last minute drives me BONKERS!!! My poor friend Rich had to put up with me when I was uber mad about it. And it caused me to fight with my parents. I kept trying to tell myself to just trust God and stop worrying but i wasn't really handing it over. And then about 10 minutes ago while i was in the bathroom ( doesn't the best ideas occur in this room?) I realized that everything would be fine. I almost laughed at myself for getting so caught up in the worry when I should just hand it all over to God and focus on doing my best while knowing that God will take care of the rest of it. Anyways all of this reminded me of an TV episode. You know where there is this HUGE problem and somehow in 30 minutes to a hour everything gets fixed. I was wishing for a TV episode life when all the problems started popping up. But really? I already have one. I know that at the end of every experience God is going to use it for his glory. Hope this helped you look at life a little differently.
CIAO!

Lack of Oxygen~

Sorry i havent been on here in awhile. Life seems to be passing me WAY too quickly. I havent found a new job yet but im working at Jimmy Johns part time so at least im out being productive lol. I dressed up as a construction worker for Halloween and then went over to my second mom's house and played board games with my friend and her boyfriend. Speaking of boys... ;) I met someone! Thats all I am going to say now... I don't wanna jinx it. But I am in a freakishly bad mood right now. My dad is driving me crazy! Don't get me wrong I love him and I normally get a kick out of hanging out with him. But lately it feels like all he does lately is talk about how to 'fix me' or guilt trips me into something. Idk its not important, you will have to forgive me, I am in one of my moods. So how have you been? Do anything interesting for Halloween?
CIAO!